Vibe Me, Baby II

This is the second installment of Prehensile Paging.

Any message you type on the pager contact page appears anonomously on my hip in about 10 seconds or so.

And I just put a new battery in my pager...yowza! You can feel the difference...so keep 'em coming.

Here are some of the more memorable recent pages (in bold) and my responses:

Do you like, leave this pager somewhere, or take it with you all over and stuff so that bizarre pages interrupt you every so often, whatever you happen to be doing?

The pages catch me off guard all day long. They make milk come out my nose during meals and give me erections during business meetings. I always have it on me, and,yes, I always have it set on "vibrate."


Thank you so much for last night, i had the best time of my life! Ive never screamed that loud in excstacy....oh god, do i have the right number?

Obviously not…unless I paged myself.


I want to slather your body in chocolate sauce and lick it all off...No I don't...DAMN THOSE VOICES

Damnit. I need to practice my Jedi Mind Tricks more. It's no good if people can snap out of it.


i got a wet pussy for you

Um, you should probably give it back to its owner. I'm sure she's worried about it.


Why does it hurt when I pee?

Maybe if you didn't grip yourself quite so firmly…It's not an udder, ya know.


Hey,will you give me sex please???

Well, since you asked so nicely and used the magic word…wait, I'll get it back, right? Is this the same guy who offered me that pussy earlier?


Hey, did you ever wear braces?

You mean like a straight-jacket? Or for my teeth? The answer to both is "yes."


Halcyon drinks his own pee...

I do not! I only drink the pee of others. Drinking your own pee is so incestuous!


How much weight will your nipple ring support before it is torn from your flesh?

I'm not sure exactly. But if you attach one end of a chain to my nipple ring and the other to the bumper of a 1985 Honda Accord, I can pull the car out of the mud with nipple intact.

Hey, you just like the way it wobbles don't you???

It's not so much the wobbling or the weebling…its that THEY WON'T FALL DOWN!!!

you lie... they always put a bit of gravy in the cherry jubilee.

Oh yeah…"they." Those bastards.

Hey, just wanted to give you a buzz and let you know that I always read the little black bars.

Prehensile Tales appreciates thorough reading.


is it necessary to show quite so much chest? it's nice an all, but you're

a regular Pamela Lee the way you sell that thing.

The Halcyon/Tommy Lee video should be available later this month…

Hey, I'll bet that you're sitting alone, pager firmly lodged in your colon, wishing someone would page right now.

I used to do that…but it was so hard to read the pages. And besides, it’s a company owned pager.

Koochie. Koochie. Koo. You're a good boy! Oh, yes you are! Oh, yes You are!

Tee, hee! Stop it…!


Hey, I want to be on the page with all the pages. I want my 15 minutes in the Prehensile spotlight. Puh-leeze?!?! Puh-leeze?!?! Thank you Halcyon! Jessi

I'm afraid that would be impossible.


Hey, this is your pager speaking: Don't do it.

Now I'm all confused. Nike was pretty convincing when they told me TO do it…they had that inspiring music and everything. I don't know who to believe anymore. (I wonder if my pager is talking about the colon thing.)

Hey, Webster! kitsch has an S in it! Spend the $50, get a dictionary.

Ah, Webster, beloved child-star…Now He was a great speller.


how about a heapin helpin of hot asian poon?

Is that a porn thing? Or a side dish? Should I bring chop sticks?


Hey, Halcyon -- the pinks ones are bumpy.

Um…its supposed to be that way…uh, the doctor said its nothing to worry about…Why don't we just turn the lights out.


Don't forget our date tonight. I'll see you at 8pm. Katie

Such a cruel trick. I know I don't have a date (they're rare enough that I would remember). But my cuddling-deprived mind wants to believe it so bad that I frantically try to think of a Katie I know. I bet there is no Katie at all, is there? Is this Darrel? William? sigh.

bzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz That's what you're feeling against your rock hard cock right now, isn't it? Pervert.

Actually, I worked through my insect fetish years ago. And it was so hard to find cooperative bees. Oh. You're talking about the pager? Heh, never mind.


want to read a few more?
EXTRA BONUS: My favorite pages of flattery, oddity, and a song.
And check the original Vibe Me, Baby page.

I'd love to receive a page from you.

Prehensile Tales always has it set on vibrate.

this tale brought to you by:
don't make me spell it out for you...

Copyright © 1998 Prehensile Tales.

d e s i g n by h a l c y o n