Major League Baseball:
Older Men Scratching in Tight Pants!

by Kaya
but can he field?

I have a question. Well… actually I have dozens, but I don't think *you* are in any position to explain why I keep fantasizing about rushing to the aid of the little girl in the Copertone ads or the disturbing popularity of Regis Philbin.

Seriously though, WHY DO BASEBALL COACHES WEAR BASEBALL UNIFORMS? Is there a remote chance they might get in the game?

"I need a pinch runner, and …. DAMN! Lasorda's not suited up!"

I mean, basketball coaches don't wear jerseys to the games, swim coaches, thankfully, don't wear Speedos to meets, and badminton coaches… well, I have no idea what they wear, but I can pretty much guarantee they dress differently than the players. If you're a coach, dress like an adult. Why are you wearing stir-ups? And cleats… my god?! You're 70 years old, when do you need that kind of traction?

I'm not saying I don't appreciate the way those snug polyester baseball pants grab the goodies of formerly athletic older men… quite the contrary. I am saying, that if I coached a baseball team it would be a lot different. Speedos for everyone. EVERYONE.

other Kaya tales
"Buy Me Some Peanuts, Cracker Jacks, and Bring Me a Pillow "

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