"email from RubberDebbie"

In response to last week's Sex Toy review of the "Debbie" molded Vagina,I received the following email.
"RubberDebbie" has also been seen frequenting CitizenX chat rooms and sending me IM's.
I don't know "RubberDebbie's alternate identity, but she certainly has given me some chuckles this week.


Dear Halcyon, (Johnny as I know you like to be called in bed)

It has come to my attention that the sex we had wasn't so great. However, there are a few things that I would like to get off of my non-existant chest...

  • God didn't make me with a body. Don't discriminate.
  • If I had a mouth, I would talk.
  • I don't have an authentic smell.
  • Please take me out on a date. Sex with you wasn't exactly what I had in mind for our first date you cheap-o!
  • Although I am not diswasher safe, at least toss me in the shower.
  • I am disease free. -I was a virgin so it was my first time. Let me experiment. I'll get better, I promise.
  • Why didn't you brag about ME to your friends. I'm not hot enough?
  • If you're just going to leave me here in this closet, could you at least get me a dildo...preferably one larger than the size of YOUR penis.
  • Why is the number of men at the real house slowly dwindling? I'm useless to all those chicks. Get me a piece of that Gunnar! Oh BABY! Or at least allow my sister to have a piece of him. Her name is RubberDottie.
  • I am sorry that things didn't work out between us. I really hope that you don't entice me with casual sex and then leave me in the gutter. This could be a rather painful break up.

In closing, I would like you to remember who got the raw end of the deal here. You are the messy one. I don't even smell...well...ok, so I smell like rubber, but that's better than some smells...right?

Anyway, maybe we will have at it again. Maybe we won't. Do you have casual sex often? Should I be tested? I hope this wasn't some sort of drunken mistake that we both made. I do have feelings for you though strangely, all of those feelings are strictly sexual. Maybe I'm just too young for you. I mean, I was only manufactured last year. Well, whatever the case, realize that it's tough being a rubber vagina. I did my best for you. I would like to work things out...maybe go out on a date, go for long walks on the beach, meet your parents, hang out with your friends. Please let me know what you want.

I love you...

Debbie the rubber vagina

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