3.31.2001 Wanna be on an MTV Documentary? MTV is filming Globalgasm sunday night. If you have a webcam and will be participating, email me!

3.30.2001 I was just testing the newsletter signup link and the confirmation page gave me a chuckle. It's always fun to stumble on old pages that I've forgotten.

last night the MTV camera crew followed us to my favorite club. It was like moving from TheRealHouse to TheSurrealHouse. I wore a wire so the camera could pick up my voice over the music and across the room. The camera guy warned me, "Just so ya know, we'll be able to hear you in the bathroom." When I *did* go to the bathroom, I altered my voice and said, "wow, look at the size of that guy's penis!" Then in another voice, "Damn! he's got a mane like a horse and he's hung like one, too!" It was a crazy experience. Still grinning.

3.29.2001 if you missed the Oscars: "I want to thank anyone who spends part of their day creating. I don't care if it's a book, a film, a painting, a dance, a piece of theater, a piece of music. Anybody who spends part of their day sharing their experience with us. I think this world would be unlivable without art ... Thank you for inspiring me. Thank you for this." -- Steven Soderbergh, Best Director (for "Traffic")

Sponges give me the heebie-jeebies. When they’re fresh from the package, they’re fine. But after they’ve been soaking up germs in the sink for a few weeks….*shudder.* They stay moist and I can practically see the little microbes jumping around the damp, festering playground. I know it’s wasteful, but I prefer paper towels

3.28.2001 I'm taking MissM on a 6 month anniversary picnic. MTV is following with a film crew. Life is a bouquet of many fruits.

3.27.2001 I can't figure out why this page is taking so long to load. Bad coding by me is my first guess. Grrrrr. Any help? Ugh. It was the BlogVoices code that was adding 5-10 seconds to the page load time. (Thanks, writer!) It's removed for the time being. I guess I'll have to struggle through a Grey Matter install pretty soon. We can still use the Discussion Boards to talk about posts/thoughts/etc.

radio show tomorrow @ 5pm.

My man, Dlove, has his new business site up. Need graphics, illustration, design work? Hire yourself an artist.

I'm a beauty at PlanetConcrete

3.26.2001 Was feeling lots of love today towards the male influences in my family. I am blessed. So I put together a photo gallery from a Xmas day we spent at the beach.

Happy Birthday, Dad. I wrote you this.

MTV is gonna film me and Kaya having lunch with our Grandpa. I just rediscovered these cool pics of my grandparents.

I wrote a little poem for MissM while in New Mexico.

3.25.2001 Overheard on the plane, following a discussion on the difficulty in spelling “Albuquerque.” “bed was always easy to spell…cause it looks like a bed, ya know…with the headboard and footboard.”

On the plane, the guy next to me requested a Coke from the steward. The clean cut, cheery man-maid of the sky said, “How’s Pepsi?!” My neighbor was silent about 15 seconds then said, “Ginger Ale.”

3.23.2001 I'm off to Albequerque. Isn't that enough? (if YOU are in Albequerque, come by my talk on Sat at 2:30!)

Kelly made a new photo page including a 2 new galleries of moi.

3.22.2001 MissM and I went to the beach to clear our heads. Man...sea anenomes are badass. In my dream house, I have a huge wall aquarium stocked with sea anenomes, sea horses, and jelly fish. I also have a recessed fireplace room, with shag carpet and built-in carpeted seating areas. What frivolous luxeries are in *your* dream house?

from the comments: "CockyBastard is the Anthony Robbins for the Internet generation. Surf with Passion!" :)

Jan gave me some good advice last night: "Play, Live, and Change the world."

My keynote this weekend at the University of New Mexico is called, "Online Intimacy: A Digital Love Story." At first I was intimidated by the fact that this was largely an academic conference. I tried to put together a talk that was academic in tone. Filled with theorems and such. Then I realized that what I have to share is stories. So I put together a dozen online experiences and weaved them into a larger story. The story of my ongoing relationship with my mistress, the Web. I think it'll be a kick. And I think people will enjoy it. I've been downplaying the event to friends, saying I have no idea why I was invited to speak. I was falling into self-effacing mode. Nobody likes a braggard, right? But the truth is I am proud to be invited. I'm still a beginner at public speaking, but I love the the thrill of being live on stage. I like the feeling of depending on my wits. I like the feeling of connecting with people. I like spreading the love.

3.21.2001 no radio show today.

Psyche emailed me long ago with the question: tell me one thing you love about yourself. Today she emailed me back my response. How cool is that!? I said: I love my cheekbones. They represent the adult me, surfacing from my pudgy-cheeked pain of youth. What do you love about yourself?

3.20.2001

Lots of All Your Base paradies at New Grounds. Mr T. Vs. Cats made me giggle.

I'm getting excited about speaking this weekend at The Southwest Symposium. It's my first time speaking in a situation like this; just me on stage for an hour or so. I have a number of penis jokes to fall back on in case it starts to go badly.

3.19.2001 Slashdot had to remove an anonymous post that included text from a scientology document. The Scientolgist threatened to sue. So slashdot posted links to hundreds of copies that exist online. Man, I love the net. It's even bigger than Scientology.

Oh, man. I love this picture of jeffrey holding the monkey. (You'd laugh, too) Also great shots of the fray reading and the Adaptive Path party.

The SXSW site posted some video from the conference. I'm in the "Lessons of the Adult Internet" and "Web Awards" clips.

3.17.2001 I watched the video of my awards show performance. I surprised myself. When I got off the stage, I felt like apologizing to the organizers for my bumbling. But It didn't look bad at all. It wasn't polished, by any means, but I was proud. I'll try to post portions of it.

I made the cover of PrayStation! Dude. Joshua Davis is a talented Motherfucker. He made haunting art out of our surreal bathroom gathering. (first link has it with sound)

GRANATOv.1 was a SXSW award winner and is pretty darn neato. (plus he gave me a mug) Check the moonrise.

3.16.2001 Ghetto Rainbow features the "straight outta Castro" rhymes of Gay2Gay and "Rear Admiral"

A number of people at SXSW told me they have had trouble accessing CockyBastard.com. So, I'm on the hunt for a new host...and I'm hungry like the wolf.

Posted my memories and photos from SXSW.

3.15.2001 A very nice article about me and the web awards from the Austin Chronicle is now online.

I posted a new wrds about meeting Larry Harvey, founder of Burning Man.

The final "entertainment break" for the SXSW awards was a SXSW-themed parody of "All Your Base." There are some very inside jokes in it, but you may get a kick out of it. And, yes, it counts as a new Tale.

Some new photo galleries are up of my roomates.

3.14.2001 Heard this from a good friend this week: "God may steer the boat, but he doesn't row."

Back from SXSW. Wow. So tired and inspired. And Its so nice to spend time with people who's vision and passion blow your mind. . I love the web more than ever.

3.12.2001 Having an amazing time at SXSW. The awards ceremony was like the soul train awards combined with a demolition derby. Good times.

3.10.2001 I'm off to Austin. ((hug))

3.9.2001 I was so caught up with whining, that I forgot to mention that Kaycee is going home! Leave it to KC to help me get perspective, once again.

I'm gonna try to start posting quotes from the message boards. Like... I think that the a%%hole bullies out there should learn from this. Don't tease shy/misunderstood/outsiders, geeks can become a lot of things... and someday one may shoot your mean and nasty a$$. Since the gun notion is floating about... this is one of the reasons I think guns make better neighbors. People would treat each other better in 2 possible senarios: 1. They are taught compassion and love. 2. They are taught fear of death. Its funny how this is a lot like the concept of religion... act as God says out of love of life or out of fear of eternal damnation. -MissM

3.8.2001 Is styn.net really sad and all about sex? The comments inspired a jumbled new wrds.

Want to freak out your Dad? Send him to http://Halcyon.isgay.com/, but substitute his name for mine. (thanks Rogers)

Cool! My brother is a "blog of note" at Blogger.

3.7.2001 My throat is trying to tell me it's sick. I refuse to listen. I'm trying to will my white bloood cells to kick ass. GooOOOOO, IMUNE SYSTEM!! 5pm radio show today may be cut to 30 minutes if my glands don't cooperate.

3.6.2001 Snoop Dogg's porn movie "...satisfies strokers and hip-hop fans alike."

I just had a chuckle reading Kaya's old reflections on Survivor

Yesterday, at this time, I was nude sunbathing. Today its raining.

3.5.2001 Brad is doing something cool. He's writing about something in his life from every letter in the alphabet. Today was "C" day in The BradLands

I used to wrestle kids at Santana when I was in High school. This atrocity seems very close. I have a weird feeling that I don't want to leave the house. I keep hearing radio reports...and I'm on the edge of tears. I picked up a book and started reading. I didn't know Henrey Rollins' "Black Coffee Blues" had so much shooting in it. I just want to crawl under my covers and make it all go away.

Wow. Jane's Addiction is headlining the Cochella Music Festival. If I was ever a groupie, it was for Janes.

crap. Thanks to everyone who sent in help. But the blog voices won't work unless I remove the base target from my header (for IE, at least. Seems to work regardless for Netscape). So, we can have blogvoices, but you may have to click "open in new window" for links until I get my shit together with individual "target=_new" tags.

I got offered a phat consulting job...and wrote about it in a new wrds

3.4.2001 How cool! There is a 4 minute quicktime movie of last years's SXSW awards show (linked on the right side)

3.3.2001 I'm having trouble installing blog voices. I think it's cause of my 'base target= " tags in my page header. If you are a javascrpt wiz, could ya throw me a bone?

3.2.2001 I'me feeling overwhelmed...but excited about my projects. I suppose that's a good place to be. Being very in love helps.

Well, Globalgasm was great for me. Fun, laugh-filled, and erotic. With the MTV crew and the wonderful distractions of my lover (and the many lingerie-clad women in this house) I’m amazed that I made it through as planned. For all the participated: thanks for coming!!!

3.1.2001 Globalgasm preparations were getting hectic. MTV is coming to our webcam house to film for a "Sex and Technology" special, and I was starting to get too caught up in the promotions/organizing of things (and stressed about how I may be portrayed). When really, I just needed to concentrate on actualizing the meaning of it...Being real and letting that truth show (as opposed to forcefully projecting the message.)

I walked into the living room last night as Angel (of Buffy fame) was saying on TV, "I've had an epiphany...there is no grand plan...therefore the smallest act of kindest is the greatest thing in the world." My existential crisis of '92 came to a close with a similar epiphany.

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