3.31.2000 Someone pointed out that you can see a HUSTLER in my magazine rack in one of my Apartment photos. Heh. Guilty as charged.

atomicoooo sent me this vision of me in my geek dream car.

Am I geeky for wanting Honda's new Gas/Electric car?

My neighbor's nephew is in town so they're going to Disneyland today. He asked, "I wonder if this will be more fun than 'Funtown' in Witchita?" My brother replied, "Well, I don't know...but they *do* have a sign out front that says 'The Happiest Place on Earth." Ah, to be in his lucky little sneakers.

3.30.2000 Now there is a RealVideo verison of the Gay-Whassup video thanks to the kindness of strangers (thanks Steve ) Now download it and send it to your contact list. Spread it like a dandelion in the breeze...like a fungus in a HighSchool locker room...like a... (I'll stop now). Let me know if there's a better way for me to distribute this Tale.

Sesame Street may be cool. But it can't compete with Halcyon Drive.

Here's a sneak peek at next week's Tale. It's a gay "Whassup!" parody (Flash .exe & quicktime movie) that I made with my brother. Anyone know how to convert a quicktime movie to an mpeg? My dream is to send this to all my friends and have it forwarded back to me (by someone who didn't know I made it). Okay, maybe it's no MLK dream...but it's still a dream.

3.29.2000 In Salon: "Evolutionary biologists recently proved through genetics that (snip) Humans share just shy of 100 percent of our genes with chimpanzees -- we are minimally different items. Lettuce and humans share 40 percent; lettuce and mushrooms share less."

3.28.2000 Posted a new wrds piece. It was from an e-mail I sent to someone who needed a hug. As I wrote it, somehow it turned into a feeling like I was *getting* a hug...from my Grandpa, no less.

3.27.2000 I visited my folks' house this weekend and saw my forgotton garden. It amazes me that with almost no care, nature still creates such beauty all by itself. (7 pictures)

I posted some Lustmonkey meeting/party pics in a zing gallery. (13 pics)

Sometimes life is so good and filled with love...but you still feel alone. (Currently accepting hugs and naked massages.)

Sometimes ya gotta Smash Regis. (The 'Andre the Giant' bomb is my favorite)

Well lookie there...I'm quoted in a new Salon article. (page 2)

This week's Tale is A Jain's Death from esheep.com.

3.26.2000 Happy birthday to my kick-ass Dad (stynlaw.com). A man who taught me the virture in honesty and the value of integrity. And, perhaps most importantly, a man who gives good hugs.

added a new photo to my b&w photography gallery.

3.25.2000 Yes. I changed a recent wrds entry (was "heart" now "brain"). I was surprised that several people noticed. I edited it.Cut it down. Ya see, In the original wrds piece, I posted someone else's words. Words that were said when emotions were heated and logic was scarce. As hugs healed and heart prevailed, I decided that I should remove that portion of it. So what remains is only the lesson learned, not the muck that got me to the thought. Only the "mental filet."

Just finished the first planning meeting for Camp Lustmonkey 2000. Burning Man is 6 months away and I'm already excited. Our camp is gonna VIBE.

3.24.2000 I ran my name through the C.Y.B.O.R.G.E.R. and found out I could be a Hydraulic Artificial Lifeform Calibrated for Yardwork and Online Nullification

Added some new wrds.

Finally an article that will help me break into the porn biz.

They're filming a movie upstairs in our building. And JOHN STAMOS is in the building! Yes, Jesse, the rock-n-roller from 'Full House" and hubby to Rebbecca de-something-or-other. As a few people went to go catch a photo, my brother yelled, "Are the twins here?! Now THAT would be something to see."

Weeks ago, i posted that the folks at beaniepeenie had to change their name for legal reasons. Congrats to Prehensile reader Andrea who's "Beanis" entry was selected a winner. (Although I'm also a fan of the runner ups, "My Little Peany" and "Meat Muppet") Check here for all the entries.

3.23.2000 I spent the day in bed. Didn't do a damn thing. So far I haven't beat myself up over it.

3.22.2000 Thanks to bwg, cockybastard now has a superfly icon when you bookmark it in IE. From a photo taken by Derek. Group projects are so much more fun now than they were in High School.

This ZEN site kicks ass. Take 5 minutes and center yourself.

My WuName is "Excitable Misunderstood Genius"

3.21.2000 My first adventure in publishing was an “alternative” high school yearbook I made with my friend Adam when we were High School seniors. We each went off to college and continued on our wacky ways. One day I found out that Adam fell in love with a wonderful girl named Summer. When Summer died from cancer last year, he started putting together a charity benefit album consisting of her favorite music. It was just released this week on Olio records. Check out the Songs of Summer to get a glimpse of the love we all deserve to feel…if only for a fleeting moment. (Then buy the CD, of course.)

Gina sent me a link to a picture of her in front of the truck with my mug on it. I find that so very, very cool.

Derek's sxsw 2000 pics are a blast. More than 1 person has said that this candid shot is their favorite halcyon pic of all time. Hnmm...maybe I shouldn't pose like a clown so much.

3.20.2000 How perfect. Last night I mentioned plaster-casting my genitals in the Prehensile Gram...then today Mark posts this link . P.S. I'd love reading riothero even if he didn't always say nice things about me.

From the "I wish I said that" category, Brad answers a questions about his personal site: "...So what's your profit model?" "I'm not in it for the money. I just want people to worship me. I guess you could say I have a prophet model."

I sent out a prehensile-gram last night. So everyone on the list now has the passwords to 2 secret photo galleries. One odd thing, I got this message bounced back: with the subject line "Profane Message Detected" *This is an automated message* CBH has an email security policy that prohibits the sending and receiving of email containing words or phrases of a profane or offensive nature. Your email entitled "[prehensile] Garafalo-gram [03.19.00]" has accordingly been blocked. For more information or queries send an email to email.admin@cbh.com.au Kind Regards The CBH Technical Support Team

3.19.2000 I got my custom stickers from Unamerican.com in the mail. I love their stuff. I've had a "I'm so fucking beautiful" sticker on my bag for weeks. Before that it was "groove matters" here's the new sticker:

Woo-Hoo!!!! I transferred the weblog to cockybastard.com and the redesign is almost complete. And I would've got away with it, too...if it wasn't for those meddlesome kids! Confusion? comments? Lemmie have it!

3.18.2000 A truly unique perspective is certain when you hang with Abdul at SXSW 2000

Yay! I was selected as one of mark's favorite 2-sided business cards! See? Putting my naked picture on my card was worth it!

3.17.2000 Thank you to everyone who helped me fix the javascript error on the new design. Let me know if any other bugs pop-up.

images and movies from SXSW from Heather. If you hold your head sideways, and wait for a couple meg download...you can see me do the airwalk. Ohhhh, yeah.

I'm getting ready to launch a minor redesign of the HTML version of cockybastard. Wanna see? Any feedback would be great. I'm moving the weblog (what you;re reading now) over to that design shortly.

3.16.2000 Dinah shared this: This morning I was listening to KFOG around 7:15 and I heard Tiffany from the Webbies come on and chat with Dave Maury & Peter Finch. She said some guy came up to her at SXSW and said "I'm going to win a Webby!", she says she said "That's a rather cocky statement." to which this guy replies "I'm from cockybastard.com!" tee, hee!!!

A too-kind look at the SXSW awards I emceed by Mike Jasper.

I uploaded some images from SXSW 2000

3.15.2000 Added a few pics to a Zing Album. FYI: I'll get pics of SXSW up ASAP. (Yes, that's a whole lotta acronyms)

Home from Austin. I got to meet some heros. To some I was a hero. I am overwhelmed and inspired and invigorated. More later. And cockybastard was nominated for a Webby. I'm up against the elegant kottke.org and the brilliant metababy.com. Everyone who votes for me gets a big ol' hug. You can leave stuff on the webby message boards, too. My favorite comment on cockybastard so far: The end is near: I think that the nomination of this site is mentioned in the book of Revelations (That person gets a hug, too) Please vote for me. Pretty Please?

3.12.2000 I'm in Texas. Met a TON of folks I respect. Hugged lots of missed friends. Went to bed last night at 4. Was fired-up all day but now I'm fading. napping sounds good. Mmmmm....hotel bedspread. My MC gig at the awards ceremony last night went pretty good, I think. I started my monologue with a Mahir impression: "I KISS YOU!" I screamed. Advice for future MCs at SXSW: When in doubt, say something nice about Texas. SXSW rekindles my faith in the web. So many smart passionate people. Who cares that they've been bloodied by IPO's and angel investor woes?...there's still a load of people who realize that the're in the middle of something magical. If they can make a million dollars in the meantime, all the better.

3.11.2000 I'm off to Texas. I'll get to see tons o' web folks. And apologize to everyone I bumped into last week when I was assaulted with 75 cent drinks. oh, and blogger redesigned. It's snazzzy! It's Powazekariffic! Damn that boy's good.

3.9.2000 If you check my webcam right now (7pm pst), you can see a TV crew behind me filming Kaya and others for a highschoolclub promotion. I'm so cool. I'm not even turning around.

Check out the cool movie maker at Nike.com.

If you're tired of writing Halcyon Photo Captions, Try these Regis and Kathy Lee photo funnies.

How cool! I have a picture in Jezebel's Mirror. (About 3 pictures deep.)

3.8.2000 Not enough guys are staring at your cleavage? Maybe you need a "Breastee" (Thanks Jenn)

Prop 22 won yesterday in Calfornia while the country drank ourselves stupid in Mardi Gras festivities. Apparently we can have a gay ol' time...We just can't have gay 'ol marriages. *sigh* I'm disappointed.

3.7.2000 My pals deron and chris are showing work at the Basile Gallery. Opening is Friday night. Come buy art!!!! (downtown in the Gaslamp: 519 Island Ave.)

Happy Mardi Gras! Time to revisit an old Tale, "GIMMIE BEADS!!!!" (You'll read why I *won't* be joining in any drunken revelry tonight.) Of course, It's also election day...so maybe I will get drunk. Whatever it takes, VOTE. It matters. And remember:If you don't vote, you forfeit your right to complain.

3.6.2000 For the terminally bored, an mpeg of my office. (Taken from Solbeam's Desk).

I filled out my absentee ballot today. The only things I really cared about were: 1) Keep the tobacco tax and 2) Allow gay marriages.

The Tale of the Week is another trip to toilet town. Why do so many of the Tales have to do with going to the bathroom? I guess they could be called a "regular" feature.

3.5.2000 I made a Photo Gallery for some desert pix. At one point, Kaya, Brandon and I were all naked on top of some dunes...sliding down them in our bare feet. We're lucky our cactus casualities were minor. Just a few little needles in my toe. Considering we were naked, it coulda been worse. MUCH worse. Yes, we did get some photos of nude sand surfing. I'll send the password and URL in the next Prehensile Gram. I think that rivaled naked bungee jumping.

I registered the domain, www.cockybitch.com. I should warn you now...my mind is running a mile a minute. It's amazing what being away from a computer for an extended stretch can do for you. I'm treading water in my creative discharge.

Spent Saturday away. Drove out 3 hours to the desert. Kaya and I met Brandon, Deron, Shonda, Skeet, and Lance for a caravan to nowhere. Beautiful and Otherwordly. Away

3.3.2000 Back from Austin. It's no wonder so many comedians talk about airplanes. They're so surreal. FYI: Airtoons are brilliant.

3.2.2000 Mmmmmmm. I've got a belly full o' cole slaw and BBQ sauce in my ears. We went to "The Salt Lick" where you BYOB. They've got all-you-can-eat meat. The menu just says, "meat." When pressed, I learned that it means: sausage, pork, and beef. When I asked for the chicken plate, the waiter wrote down, "1 Pansy Platter." Tasty stuff, I must say.

I'm heading to Austin today for work. Back tommorow. Just a quick trip to test the phrase, "Don't Mess with Texas."

3.1.2000 Happy March! Want a chuckle, add a caption to Teacosy's Halcyon Picture Captions

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